PEPO by Gabriel Sundukian, translated by Ervant Megerditchian Characters ARUTIN ZIMZIMOV, a rich merchant, sixty years old, medium height, stocky build, ruddy complexion, round face, heavy eyebrows, and trimmed mustache. His short gray hair is dyed jet black. He wears a European costume, white shirt, colored collar, vest and trousers, black coat, derby hat, watch and chain, and carries his pocketbook inside his vest pocket. He sports a colored silk handkerchief and worry beads. His speech and motions are slow, and he appears to be an honest man. EPEMIA, ARUTIN'S second wife, thirty years old, a handsome woman with auburn hair. She wears a beautiful European-style sky-blue dress, Georgian hat—a flat cap from which a white veil, attached with a silver pin, hangs to her waist. She is adorned with a gold watch and chain, many rings with precious stones on her fingers, and a red band round her neck. Her speech and motions are quick and full of life. She walks smartly and quickly. PEPO, a fisherman, thirty-five years old, tall, strong, muscular, broad shoulders, regular features, short black hair growing low over his forehead, thin eyebrows and mustache. He has two suits of clothes. One for everyday use, like that of a Georgian workman, is dark and plain with wide trousers, tucked in woolen leggings, and a narrow silver girdle. He wears a reddish brown Caracal hat (with bent top), made of the fur of the Asian lynx, and carries a red cotton handkerchief. The other, his best suit, is in the same style, made from more expensive material. His walk is firm, his voice sweet but forceful, and his speech and personality very pleasant. Most often he wears a hat. SHUSHAN, PEPO’s widowed mother, fifty years old, medium height. She wears a Georgian ladies costume, black mantilla on the back of her head, a plain black dress, cut high in front, and a simple black shawl. When outdoors she wears a sable wrap. KEKEL, PEPO’s sister, eighteen years old, medium height, long black hair, fresh attractive features, a sweet voice and modest demeanor. She wears a handkerchief and veil on her head. GIKO, PEPO’s relative, sixty-five years old, medium height, slightly bent, has gray hair and a mustache, and is close shaven. He wears a Georgian costume, white shirt with black edges,wide blue trousers, plain woolen belt, black shoes, and Caracal hat dyed black with its top bent back. He always carries a cane, a snuffbox, and a large blue handkerchief. His walk, speech, and all his motions are very slow. He stutters profusely throughout. KAKULI, PEPO’s friend, twenty-five years old, a bit shorter than PEPO with a ruddy face and handsome features, dark hair combed over his forehead, thin eyebrows and mustache, and sparse short beard. He wears showy clothes like a carefree Caucasian redneck young blood, a large Caracal hat dyed Baku-style blue, and a loose-fitting red silk shirt,wide blue (or black) trousers, tucked-in woolen leggings, and a broad silver girdle embroidered with gold thread. His handkerchief is as beautiful as it is large. His voice is gruff and speech coarse. Very often he keeps his hat on. GIGOLI, ARUTIN'S store salesman, twenty-five years old. He wears a white Georgian costume buttoned in front, a narrow silver girdle, and a skullcap that is often in his hand. SAMSON, ARUTIN'S butler, eighteen, with long black hair combed in the latest style. He wears a Parisian shirt open in front, a white bandoleer slung across the shoulders with five silver cartridges on each side, close-fitting trousers, a silver girdle with dagger and small box on the side, black shoes in the latest mode and nicely polished. He is always hatless. TWO OTHER SERVANTS, Employed in Arutin’s house, hatless, wearing white gloves and dress suits. The action of the play takes place in Tiflis, Russian Transcaucasia, 1870 Act I The scene is set in a multipurpose room in an old-fashioned house. Poorly furnished, it contains a china closet with shelves, one window, and three doors-right, left, and back center. At left, there is an immovable high takht, covered with a rug and cushions. At corner right is a kitchen table with a colored table cloth and a clothesline hanging above it. On the china closet shelves are old-fashioned copper, wood, and clay pots, and various shaped wineglasses. A few chairs complete the room’s furnishings. Scene 1 SHUSHAN (seated on the sofa, knitting stockings ) Didn’t you hear me? KEKEL (seated on the chair near the table busy sewing, takes another thread from her scrap bag.) Just let me finish this first, Mama. SHUSHAN Leave it, rest a while; finish it later. KEKEL I can’t, Mother. The customer will be here soon. SHUSHAN Devil take him! It’d be okay if only he were a more generous man! KEKEL That’s the way it is, Mama. If I don’t have things ready before he comes, he won’t pay in full. You know he’s a man without a conscience. SHUSHAN You’re going to go blind. You didn’t sleep a wink last night, and then you started work before dawn. KEKEL What can we do, Mama? It’s not easy for poor people like us to make a living. SHUSHAN That’s enough, Kekel! Damn our luck! We’ll get by somehow. KEKEL Right this minute, Mama. As God’s my witness, there’s only a little more. SHUSHAN I couldn’t sleep, thinking about you and your brother. You with your problems and your brother with his worries. (Pause, then to herself ) I wonder why he’s so late? I hope nothing’s happened to him. KEKEL (anxious to placate her) You mean he’s never been out all night before, Mama? SHUSHAN He usually comes home by early morning. But it’s almost noon now, and there’s no sign of him. KEKEL Maybe he’s busy in the market. SHUSHAN (sighing) God willing, you’re right, my child! My heart’s uneasy. Who knows? Maybe the river rose and swept him away. Maybe he jumped in to save someone and drowned. KEKEL Now Mama, why are you talking like this? SHUSHAN If anything happens to him, we’re lost. KEKEL In God’s name, Mama dear, stop worrying. He’s not a child. All your talk’s only upsetting me. SHUSHAN What kind of a life is this? (She looks up.) Oh, Arutin! May Almighty God be your judge. (Footsteps are heard offstage.) KEKEL I think he’s here, Mother! SHUSHAN (listening) Is that really him? (Shaking her head) No! KEKEL (also listening) Oh, it’s only Giko! Scene II The Same, GIKO GIKO (He enters by center door, wearing a hat and with cane in hand, stuttering.) G-good m-morning to y-you! SHUSHAN (sadly) Good morning, GIKO! Come in! KEKEL (She stands and nods to GIKO. To herself ) I dropped a dish towel this morning. I knew someone was going to come. (She sits and resumes her work.) GIKO (sitting on a chair close to SHUSHAN ) How are y-you? A-Are things g-good? SHUSHAN Thank God, we’re still alive! GIKO Thank G-God! Where’s Pepo? Isn’t he home y-yet? SHUSHAN No! Any news? GIKO Y-yes! I have. SHUSHAN I knew it. May I go blind! What news have you brought? GIKO (soberly) What news? SHUSHAN Yes! GIKO It isn’t such good news, Sh-Shushan ! SHUSHAN (more frightened) What is it? Has he drowned? ( KEKEL drops her sewing and stares at them, more frightened.) GIKO (calmly) Who’s drowned? What are you talking about? SHUSHAN He hasn’t drowned then? GIKO (crossing himself ) For the love of God, I don’t know what you’re talking about. SHUSHAN Last night, around midnight, he took his net and went to the river, and he hasn’t returned since. GIKO G-God bless your soul! You frightened me for a minute! He’s not afraid of drowning. A river wilder than our own Kura couldn’t drown him. SHUSHAN Then what news were you talking about? GIKO What n-news? SHUSHAN Out with it, for the love of God! GIKO W-wait a minute! Have a little p-pa-tience! The Lord have mercy on your mother’s soul. God has written a lot of things on people’s brows, sometimes h-happiness, sometimes s-sadness. (He takes his snuffbox from his vest pocket.) KEKEL (to herself ) Whatever he says is always disturbing. SHUSHAN Sadness! That’s what God gives us, morning, noon, and night. GIKO What can you do, Sh-Shushan ? Our fate’s in God’s hands. Both s-sadness (yawning) and h-happiness. (Yawning again, he inhales some snuff.) Hum, hoh. A man’s affairs go as G-God wishes. SHUSHAN So be it! What can we do? GIKO That’s so, Sh-Shushan. This morning I heard some bad news. I was uneasy so I went to see your future son-in-law and talked to him face to face. (To KEKEL) He asked about you and sends his compliments, KEKEL! ( KEKEL bows her head slightly to GIKO, dries her tears and continues sewing.) He said he misses you a lot. (He inhales more snuff and splutters.) ( KEKEL wipes her eyes again.) SHUSHAN You’ve worn us out waiting for you to get to the point. In Heaven’s name! Tell us what you’ve got to say and be done with it! GIKO Okay, okay. Shushan (Inhaling snuff ) Heavenly, believe me! Hum! When God created men, He gave them patience, too. (Wiping his nose with a handkerchief ). SHUSHAN Oh, you and your sayings! GIKO (inhaling snuff again) Hmm. I was going to say that . . . (building into a sneeze) that . . . (He sneezes.) Achew! (About to sneeze again) A-a-a (He sneezes.) Achew. Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, some snuff this. You s-see, I sneezed twice. That’s a sign of good luck. SHUSHAN Bless you! GIKO Long life . . . (About to sneeze) . . . to, to, to, y-your family. (He sneezes.) Achew! SHUSHAN (aside) Oh, damn you and your gibberish. GIKO That one was for good luck and a half more (About to sneeze ) and this, this, this. (He sneezes again.) That’s double luck. At this rate, there’ll be no end to my good luck. SHUSHAN What are you blabbering about? Luck has nothing to do with sneezing. GIKO Luck’s in the hands of God, Sh-Shushan . (He puts snuffbox in his pocket.) It’s real nippy, this cursed stuff. Still it’s a thousand to one I’ll sneeze with the first pinch. I don’t think they gave me the usual snuff. Everybody’s in a racket nowadays, Sh-Shushan ! (He again takes the snuffbox out of his pocket and opens it.) I’m afraid it’s been cut with something. (Examining the snuff ) But I can’t see anything wrong with it. Shushan , your eyesight’s better. (He shows the box to SHUSHAN). SHUSHAN (to herself ) Damn your eyes. KEKEL (to herself ) I can’t stand it anymore. GIKO Take a look, for the love of God! SHUSHAN (to herself ) This is just too much! (She takes the box and examines it.) It looks all right to me. But, for the love of God, give us the news you have. You’re killing us with your stalling. (She puts the box on the couch.) GIKO Why are you in such a hurry? Let’s wait till PEPO gets back so we’ll all hear what I have to say. (Continuing to wipe his nose.) KEKEL (to herself ) I see, now. He wants to join us for dinner! (To SHUSHAN) He thinks we’ve plenty to eat, so he’s come to scrounge. SHUSHAN (to herself ) Aih! (To KEKEL) Watch your mouth or you’ll break out in spots. (To GIKO) Out with it. Give us your news. GIKO I will, Shushan . (In a low voice) Send your daughter out for a minute. SHUSHAN (softly) She’s busy with her work and won’t hear. Tell me quietly. GIKO It’d be bad if she overheard, Shushan! You don’t know what Khikar (putting his index finger on his forehead) says about such things. SHUSHAN Khikar? Who’s this old fool Khikar? How did he get mixed up in all this? (GIKO bursts out laughing and then begins to cough.) SHUSHAN (to herself) May you roast in hellfire if you don’t tell us. GIKO (continuing to cough) Khikar . . . (He coughs.) . . . was a philosopher. (He coughs.) PEPO (singing the first verse of a song off stage) Wine is from Damascus grapes, Come share with me its rich, full blend. KEKEL (running to the door, full of joy) It’s Pepo! Pepo’s here! Scene III The same and PEPO PEPO (He enters by the center door, with his hat on, in his working clothes, sleeves turned up above the elbows, carrying a net on his shoulder and a red handkerchief full of live fish hanging from his belt in front. He continues singing the song.) Wine is from Damascus grapes, Come share with me its rich, full blend. Brandy is from Persian grapes. Raise your glass and drink, my friend. KEKEL Heaven help us, PEPO! We’ve been worried sick wondering where you were. SHUSHAN What’s the matter with you? You go off and then disappear. PEPO (happy) Ha! If I didn’t go off and disappear, we’d need manna from heaven to eat. Ooh, GIKO! You’ve come at the right time. I’m going to treat you to some trout. But if you drop any of your snuff on them, you won’t even get a whiff. (He draws out a big fish from his handkerchief.) You see! (Patting GIKO’s cheeks with its tail) Oh boy! Look at that, will you! GIKO Hey! What do you think you’re doing? (KEKEL laughs.) SHUSHAN (laughing) Take it easy! This is no time for practical jokes! He was about to say something! PEPO (retying the handkerchief and laughing) About to say something? I’d say he was talking like hailstones, showering word after word. (He grabs hold of GIKO’s left hip and shakes it vigorously.) How are you, Giko? How are you? GIKO My, oh my! You’ve got a hand of iron. PEPO (laughing) Did you think something had happened to me? I’m not decrepit like you. (Giving handkerchief of fish to KEKEL) Now! Take those and put them in water. And make a good fire. (In a low voice) We’ve enough wood, haven’t we? KEKEL (happy, softly) We’ve enough for two more meals. (She takes the fish.) Shall I fillet them? PEPO No! No! No! Kakuli asked us to wait for him. He loves to fillet fish. (Taking the fish that was in KEKEL’s hand) Look at this frisky one, will you? He must have been hiding at the bottom. Take them away. I’d give my life for those beauties. If the fish weren’t free, who’d give them to us? (Tapping his vest pocket and in low voice to KEKEL) Don’t worry, Kekel. You see, I’ve money, too. I sold ten rubles worth in the market. KEKEL That’s why you were so late. PEPO Yes! I’d like to go fishing tonight, too. You see, God’s been good to me lately. KEKEL Oh, Pepo! You work too hard and long for us. (She goes out the door to the left, taking with her the sewing bag and handkerchief of fish.) Scene IV The same without KEKEL PEPO What else can I do? Giko! Tell me! What’s best, money or health? GIKO It’s better to have both if God grants it. PEPO You’ve lived all these years, and still you don’t know that God doesn’t dole out money. If God gives a man health, the money follows. (Opening the net) Did I get this with money? (He slaps his chest.) Let this heart tick on. (He bends, examines the net, and laughs.) What a net this is! I’ve cast it so many times, but it’s still in good condition. The best spot for fishing on the Kura is Peter Morev’s place. When I throw my net, zoom, zoom, the frisky fish leap into it. If people had any sense, they’d do nothing but fish. Casting your net into the water and drawing it out makes your heart pound with excitement. Life and death pulses before you. And at night, you converse with the stars, as the moon hovers over your head like a fluttering moth. And when you’re done and come home, you feel so good as you lay out your wet net. (He throws his net over GIKO’s head, as he speaks.) Giko, what a wonderful fish you make! All we need is a big pot to cook you in. (He laughs.) SHUSHAN (laughing) What the devil’s gotten into you, Pepo? GIKO (throwing off the net) You frightened me, my boy! What sort of joke is this? PEPO (folding the net) We have to have some fun sometimes. GIKO You seem so excited today. PEPO (spreading the net on the line) What am I supposed to be? Half-baked stew like you, inhaling snuff all the time and chomping my words like a camel chewing Turkish delight? (He laughs.) GIKO (sighing) Ooh, Pepan, my dear boy. SHUSHAN No more jokes. I told you before . . . listen! My heart’s racing! (To PEPO) He’s heard some bad news about your brother-in-law to be, I’m sure. PEPO (wary) Bad news? What is it? GIKO Sit down, Pepo! Bless you! PEPO I’m okay as I am. Go on, tell us. GIKO No! It’d be much better if you sat. PEPO (irritated) Oh, merciful God! (He takes a chair and sits.) All right. I’m sitting. GIKO Wait a minute! We can’t work things out if you’re going to get irritated. We’ve got to think and plan ahead. (Looking for his snuffbox) What happened to my snuffbox? It was right here. PEPO (finding the box and handing it to GIKO) Here! Take it. I know you can’t say a word without taking a pinch. GIKO (taking some snuff ) You see, Nephew! This morning I smelled a rat. (Inhaling snuff, to SHUSHAN ) Hmm! Word is, they’ve found another girl for your son in-law to-be! SHUSHAN Damn our luck! (Alarmed, PEPO emits a prolonged cry.) GIKO Yes! And the new fiancée is a very good girl, they say, and her dowry is much more than you promised for Kekel. (He inhales snuff again.) Hmm. PEPO (angrily) Heavens! Will you stop taking snuff? (Snatching the snuffbox, he spills some into GIKO’s palm and pushes it up his nose.) Here, take your fill! GIKO Oh, oh! My snuff! What a crazy creature you are! (He puts the snuff back into the box.) PEPO On my soul, Giko, you won’t get out of here alive if you don’t tell us everything right now! GIKO Just give me a chance. SHUSHAN (to PEPO) Heavens! You’re confusing him. PEPO Come on! Hurry up! GIKO Yes! I was going to say that . . . What was it I was going to say? I’ve forgotten! PEPO (to himself in a low voice) Oh, what pain and grief you are. GIKO (continuing) Yes! I heard that news this morning! PEPO Damn it! What kind of a man are you? You already said that. Then what? GIKO Oh yes! Then, I went to confront your brother-in-law to be, but he wasn’t at home. Then I went to his store. What do you suppose I saw? That hustler, Mrs. Natale—you know, the matchmaker—whispering to him. Seeing that, I bit my little finger. (He puts his little finger in his mouth.) I thought it looked serious, so I waited awhile, and as soon as that devil left, I approached him and grilled him in detail. PEPO (impatiently) And what did he say? GIKO Just a minute! I’m telling it in order, don’t you see? PEPO (raising his fist) Giko! Watch it! As God’s my witness, you’re going to get it! GIKO (drawing himself back) Stop mixing me up! SHUSHAN (impatiently rubbing her knee during this conversation) What’s gotten into you, PEPO? GIKO First, he pretended not to hear, then he broke down and confirmed what I’d heard earlier. I can say by all that’s holy, I almost swallowed my tongue. SHUSHAN May the earth open up and swallow him! PEPO (angrily) Are you going out of your mind or playing games? GIKO Upon my soul it’s true! PEPO So what did he say then? GIKO He said, “I like Kekel very much, but since things haven’t come to a head, what can I do?” SHUSHAN (striking her knees with both hands and referring to the fiancé) Just listen to that cad! PEPO (angrily) What does he mean, “things haven’t come to a head?” GIKO Just that. He said, “Why don’t you give me the dowry you promised?” (Sighing) Oh, God! PEPO Who said we won’t give what we promised? Do you mean to tell me he doesn’t know why we haven’t paid him yet? GIKO “How long do I have to wait?” he asked. SHUSHAN Is he waiting? Who’s telling him to wait? Why didn’t he ask for his money? Let him ask. When we get it, it’s his! (To herself, looking up) May God be your judge, Arutin! GIKO What he says is that he wants a girl, not a headache. (He shakes his head.) PEPO We discussed all this a hundred times. Where to go from here? GIKO That’s just it, Pepo! He says, “The matter could drag on for a year, and I can’t wait any longer. I want to get married, right away. (He cries.) I’ve sinned, Oh, Lord! It’s all my fault! SHUSHAN In a word, Giko, he’s jilting Kekel. PEPO So that’s it? GIKO If we don’t come across with the money, the deal’s off. PEPO Just like that? GIKO Right! PEPO (He jumps up angrily from his chair, leans forward, strikes his fist to his palm, and speaks out to the brother-in-law to be.) You’ll get what’s coming to you. (He goes to GIKO with open arms.) What did you say to him after that, Giko? GIKO (Drawing back, he stands up.) Tell me what I was supposed to say. PEPO (moving toward him) Couldn’t you get across to him that we’re honest? GIKO (pulling back) Ah! Of course I did! PEPO (moving forward again) Then? GIKO (eyes averted) Then? He just repeated himself. PEPO (pressing forward) And you went along with that? GIKO (turning away) Ah! PEPO (nearing him) Why didn’t you use your head? GIKO (He gradually reaches stage right but finds no way out) Ah! May your father rest in peace! How could I top what he said? PEPO So you didn’t say a damn thing? SHUSHAN Pepo! Control yourself! That’s no way to talk. GIKO Oh Pepo, I told him what I’ve already said. I said, “Wait until Arutin pays up, then you can get married.” “Or,” I said, “Get married now and then get the money from Arutin yourself.” PEPO And then? GIKO Then he gave me an ultimatum and said, “I’ve no head for headaches. If you can bring me the money today, I’ll marry her tonight. I’m a man of my word. PEPO Oh, Giko! As if that’s something to boast about. Saying, “I’m a sensible man, I’ve read the wise man Khikar’s writings from beginning to end.” Is that all you could do? GIKO But (He coughs.) What have I done wrong? (Intensely coughing) PEPO With friends like you, who needs enemies? SHUSHAN Pepo! What’s gotten into you? PEPO (leaving GIKO) Nothing! I’ve got to see the man and get the story straight. SHUSHAN (She stands.) Wait here for me, Pepo! Let me go and see that bitch Natale first. (She puts on her cloak and goes out in hurry.) Giko! Come with me for the love of God and help me out of this corner. (She exits by the center door.) GIKO (severe choking cough, to himself. ) Working with you’s a real headache. (He follows SHUSHAN .) PEPO (as GIKO leaves) And we took you for a man. Scene V PEPO alone, after a brief silence PEPO So you want another girl! Over my dead body! (Silence again, then to himself) No PEPO! You’re a decent guy. You like things straight and businesslike. Your brother-in-law isn’t in the wrong! You made him a promise. You have to keep to it. That’s all! You must give him the shirt off your back if you have to, even if it kills you, but you have to come through. But how am I going to produce that damn money? Who’ll lend me such a large sum? (Looking at the walls) Who’d give me anything for what’s in here? If I mortgage the house and try to sell our furniture and clothing, what would I get for them? Not even half what they’re worth. This is it—the end! This is what you wanted, Arutin. You’ve tormented me long enough, and now I’ve come to this. That’s it! I’ll be disgraced in people’s eyes. How am I going to face my friends after this? What’ll they think of me? (He throws his hat on the floor.) I spit on your honor! Scene VI PEPO and KEKEL KEKEL (entering door left, confused.) What’s up, Pepo? PEPO Nothing! (Lifting his hat and shaking it clean) Nothing! What did you think could be up? KEKEL Why are you trying to conceal things from me? (Crying) I heard. I know all about it, Pepo! PEPO (putting his hat on) What did you hear, Kekel? KEKEL (in anguish, drying her tears with a handkerchief) I heard, PEPO dear. I heard Mama and GIKO talking as they left the house just now. He’s jilting me. PEPO Have patience, Kekel! Have patience! God is merciful. KEKEL If He’s merciful, why’s He been so hard-hearted to me. We were engaged and congratulated by everybody. That man kissed me in public, and now he discards me. Did God create me to be a useless rag thrown in a corner? Am I dust under everyone’s feet? Where’s my honor? (She cries and dries her tears.) PEPO Kekel, there’s no need to cry. KEKEL (continuing to cry) I’d rather be dead and buried. How am I going to face my girlfriends after this? They’ll all gossip about me. They’ll ridicule me and laugh at me. (Sobbing, she dries her tears.) PEPO (embracing her) Kekel! Oh, my dear! KEKEL Tie a stone around Kekel’s neck, Pepo, and throw her into the Kura. How can I go on living after this? PEPO Cheer up, Kekel dear! All this is only a question of money. We’ll find it, no matter what. If Arutin doesn’t give us what he owes, I’m going to sell everything. I’ll beg and borrow, but I won’t desert you. KEKEL No! No! PEPO! I heard that the money is due today, and who would lend it to us so quickly? And besides, you’ve already pawned yourself to the hilt. If it weren’t for money, I wouldn’t be in this disgrace. (She cries.) KAKULI (behind the stage) Pepo! KEKEL I’m better off dead! (Drying her tears, she runs out of door left.) PEPO (slapping hands on knees) Your Pepo’s luck has run out, Kekel! (He sits on couch bemoaning his fate) Scene VII PEPO and KAKULI KAKULI (Hat on, he enters from center door, holding a handkerchief full of provisions in one hand and carrying a half-gallon wine bottle in the other.) I’ve got some wine here, a wine to turn your head! Believe me, that took some doing! PEPO (crestfallen) Just in time for a party KAKULI What’s up? PEPO Nothing! KAKULI You think I can’t tell? I’d know you even if you turned on a spit. PEPO We’ll talk about it later, okay? KAKULI Hey! Have you been going out with those louts again? Steer clear of them, if you know what’s good for you. PEPO They don’t let me alone. KAKULI Let’s drown your worries in a glass. I used to worry all the time. But now (tapping the half-gallon bottle), say no more. I’ve found a way to deal with them. When I see a drinking horn, that’s it. (He drinks long and deep, directly from the wine bottle and starts to sing.) My dearest, don’t cry I pray. Give only a day to sorrow. For whoever locks a door today, PEPO (shaking his head and in a low voice reciting the last line of poem) Shall open it tomorrow. KAKULI (He continues singing and finishes.) Shall open it tomorrow. Don’t cry! Now! (Raising the half-gallon to PEPO) Drink! It’ll cut your miseries like a sword. PEPO: Eh! KAKULI You’re full of headache and pain. Hmm! I see you’re in a damn rut. You’ve got some damn big problems plaguing you today. How big are they? (He puts the laden handkerchief and half-gallon on the table and raises his hands to his head to indicate horns.) My God, look here! Let’s play leapfrog. PEPO I’ve no time for jokes, Kakuli. Leave me alone for the love of God. They’ve got us by the throat. (He stands up.) KAKULI What’s the trouble? PEPO Nothing could be worse. He’s breaking off with my sister. KAKULI Your brother-in-law to be? PEPO Who else? KAKULI No kidding? PEPO As God is my witness! KAKULI That son of a bitch. (To PEPO) Let’s go and give him a good beating, Pepo! I’ll give him such a shot he’ll spin like a top. You see! I kept telling you, Pepo. You’d no business getting mixed up with a merchant. PEPO It’s all over, Kakuli! What’s the use of rehashing it? The point now is if we don’t give him what we promised immediately, he’s going to announce his engagement to another girl tonight. KAKULI Wrap it up then. (He unbuckles his silver girdle.) If you’re short, throw this in. It’ll net a hundred rubles. (He holds up the girdle with his left hand.) Otherwise, PEPO (displaying his right fist) I have this! That’s all I have to offer. PEPO Those amount to nothing, Kakuli. You know very well we’ve promised a thousand rubles, and that cursed Arutin keeps putting me off. KAKULI I’m giving it to you straight. We’ll never get a cent out of that guy, till we beat his belly like a drum. PEPO Oh, Kakuli! You settle everything with your fists. KAKULI If he really owes you, why wouldn’t he shell out? (He puts on his girdle again.) PEPO What do you mean “if he really owes” me?” Am I a liar? It’s just that I can’t find the damned iou. KAKULI What iou? That’s news to me! PEPO You mean I didn’t tell you? KAKULI No! PEPO Yes! We had a note from Arutin, and now it’s lost. KAKULI No, PEPO. The only thing I knew was that the vulture owed your father money. But this is the first I’ve heard of a note. How did it get lost? PEPO God only knows. It’s a long story. KAKULI Try me! PEPO What’s the use? KAKULI Please. PEPO Here’s how the story goes. My father had some money and invested it with him at a good rate of interest. My father kept the promissory note so close to his chest that, while he was alive, I’d say I’d seen that damn note maybe twenty times. About a week before his death, the poor man had the note in his hand. After his death, we opened the strongbox, but no hide nor hair of the note. KAKULI Why, PEPO! Could it be that Arutin stole the note. PEPO Don’t be stupid. How could he have gotten into our strongbox? KAKULI Who stole it then, PEPO? PEPO If I knew who, there wouldn’t be a problem. KAKULI Maybe your father “took” it with him. PEPO We thought so, too. While dressing him for the wake, unbeknownst to us, the note could have been in his clothing. KAKULI Oh Pepo! Wait till you see what’s going to happen to Arutin in the next life. Four pairs of devils will put the note in front of him. I’d go to hell myself to see that show. (They laugh.) Pepo, never mind the joke! Search the house again. It may turn up. PEPO What are you talking about? We already turned everything in the house upside down. KAKULI Does that “buffalo head” even know that the note is lost? PEPO He must know. That’s why he’s not paying. KAKULI Doesn’t he know he owes you that money? PEPO Of course, he knows! KAKULI Then he should cough up. PEPO Take the cotton out of your ears and get it straight, will you! The man said, “I can’t remember anything.” And on top of that, he said, “My books don’t show a record of such a note. Bring me the note, and I’ll give you the money.” KAKULI Upon my soul, PEPO, as sure as I’m standing here, I’ll have it out with him in the morning. There’s no other way. Leave it to me. When he comes back from his gardens and orchards in Ortajala with his hands behind his back like this (He puts his hands behind his back and walks a few steps like Arutin.), I’ll beat him so hard, he’ll holler louder than the guy selling ice in the street. PEPO You’re lucky, Kakuli. You’ve no sister to marry off. KAKULI That’s no problem. I wouldn’t have run after a merchant like you did. I’d have given her to a friend, even a happy-go-lucky fellow like me. God created us like birds, who work and eat a day at a time. Why think about tomorrow or the next world? PEPO All right! All right! Don’t strain yourself. That’s enough. Go clean the fish. Then we’ll sit back and have a few drinks. Afterward we’ll see what God gives us. KAKULI Right! That’s my specialty! But where’s the table? I want to lay out the food first. (He takes hold of the handkerchief of food.) PEPO Just a minute! (He pushes sofa cushions to one side, takes an old-fashioned blue table cloth, wooden spoons, and a few plates from the china closet.) Here! Bring it here! (He spreads the tablecloth on the takht and puts the food on it.) KAKULI (Kneeling on the floor, he pushes his hat back on his head with his arm, opens the bundle, takes out some dried fish, green vegetables, flat bread, and cheese preserved in sheepskin and puts everything on the table.) Look at this variety of food! Here’s some flat bread and fish for you. (He folds the empty handkerchief.) PEPO (inspecting the cheese) Looks great! KAKULI How about these greens? (He takes a green leaf and shakes it.) Look at this! It’s like velvet! PEPO (subdued) You’re a good man, Kakuli! Let me get some glasses. KAKULI (jumping up) Ha! That’d be a damn shame. Whoever heard of anyone drinking wine like this from glasses. Think of your soul. (He fixes his hat on his head and gets the half-gallon bottle.) Why don’t you bring those glazed clay mugs, so while we drink we can see our saintly reflections in them? (He puts the half-gallon on the table.) PEPO I know what you want. (He goes to the china closet and brings two mugs, a few wine glasses and a silver-trimmed wooden pitcher.) Here’s a mug for you. Take this one, too, if you want. (He arranges them on the tablecloth.) KAKULI (lifting the wooden pitcher) I’d die for you, Pepo, my friend! What a sport you are! You’ve got style! That’s all there is to it. (Raising it to his lips as if to drink, to the pitcher) Oh my nightingale, your gurgling song is like a serenade to me. (Kissing the pitcher) Lay your problems on me, PEPO. PEPO Would that I had none, and we’d both have it made. KAKULI (indicating the pitcher) If a man adopted a child like this, it would raise his spirits out of the doldrums. (He puts the pitcher on the table.) PEPO Fine! Get going and prepare the fish! I’ll take care of these. KAKULI I’ll cook you a fish that’ll get you into the spirit.(GIKO, hat on, cane in hand, and SHUSHAN , with sable wrap, enter by the center door.) Scene VIII The same, with GIKO and SHUSHAN KAKULI Hello, Mama! (PEPO looks at SHUSHAN with anticipation.) SHUSHAN (to KAKULI) Bless you, my son! KAKULI Hi, Giko. (Coming forward, winking and whispering to PEPO) Is this the best guest you could find? PEPO Hold on! (To SHUSHAN) What news? (KAKULI goes behind GIKO, imitating him inhaling snuff.) SHUSHAN What would you expect? May the ground open up and swallow me! If we can’t produce the money by tonight, PEPO, it’s all over. (To herself ) Oh Arutin! May you get what’s coming to you. (She takes off her sable wrap.) There’s no hope he’ll cough up today, and who else would trust us? I arrived in time to catch that bitch Natale. She was bringing the last offer from the girl’s father to our cad of a son-in-law. Devil take him! PEPO Mama! What do you want from the guy? Are we going to give him what we promised or not? He’s decent enough. Why should he take the fall? If we take him for a ride, nothing’s sacred anymore. How many times did I tell you, Mama? Wait till we get the money before announcing the engagement? But there was no way I could persuade you! You said, “No problem, Arutin’s not going anywhere, he wouldn’t take advantage of us.” Now, Mama, I’d like to see you try to get him to fork over the money. GIKO (With a long sigh, he takes a seat near the table.) Oh, for that note, how did it get lost? (He slaps his knees.) PEPO Enough Giko! If you don’t stop, there’s no telling what I’ll do to you this minute. If you hadn’t poked your nose into this business, we wouldn’t be in disgrace now. To hell with money and the wretch who dreamed it up. GIKO Oh PEPO, my boy! You don’t know how my heart races. What can I do? What can I say? Why don’t you finish me off, so I can be free. PEPO Don’t give me that stuff, GIKO. You see I’ve got problems galore heaped on my head! And you pile more sorrow and anguish on me? Think about that before you go shooting off your mouth. GIKO (sighing deeply) Oh dear, oh dear! (He dries his eyes with his hands.) KAKULI Hold it, PEPO. Wasn’t there a witness to the debt? PEPO Are you some sort of wise guy? If that’d been the case, we wouldn’t be in this mess now. GIKO What the devil am I if not a witness? But what’s the use? KAKULI How come? PEPO (to KAKULI) Let me set you straight. The scoundrel says a witness’s testimony doesn’t count. KAKULI (to himself, shaking his head) Bullshit. In that case I’ll have to shake him up a bit. SHUSHAN That blackguard gave us short shrift the day we went to claim the money. PEPO He said, “I can’t remember. My books don’t show a record. If I gave you a promissory note, bring it in and take your money.” SHUSHAN He’s pretending it never happened? A rich man like him shouldn’t be so small! What’s a thousand rubles to a well-heeled big shot like him? If he wanted to, he could make us a present of it and never miss it. PEPO You’re right. He’s insulting us right to our face. SHUSHAN Let’s see if that’s the lay of the land. (In a tearful voice) I’ll go to him; I’ll kneel before him; I’ll burst out crying and pray for the longevity of his family. I’ll take an oath that if we later present the note, he can have his way with us. I’ll even sign a release before ten witnesses. He has to die some day. How can he ignore his soul? PEPO Wait, wait, Mama! I’ll go! I’ll be back shortly. Till then, rest easy. SHUSHAN Have something to eat first. PEPO No! I couldn’t swallow a spoonful till I see him. Where are my good clothes? SHUSHAN I put them in the chest yesterday. KAKULI Shall I come, too, PEPO? PEPO No! You’ve got your hands full. I’ll be back soon. (He exits by door right.) KAKULI You know best. (Striking his chest) Oh, Arutin! I’ll be damned if I don’t beat you to a pulp! You’ll see. (He exits by center door.) Scene IX SHUSHAN , GIKO GIKO (sitting close to the table, inhaling snuff ) Hasten your judgment, Oh Lord! SHUSHAN (sitting on takht, drawling) Oh God, You send some people carts full of wood to burn, while we haven’t a straw to start a fire. GIKO Yes, yes, Shushan. SHUSHAN Blessed be the Lord’s dominion. He gives wealth to those unable to enjoy it and denies us our daily bread. Glory be to Him! His will be done. Perhaps that was written on our forehead. GIKO (approaching the table) And yet God is merciful, Shushan! (Taking a piece of dried bread, he shakes his head.) There’s this. We’re not starving. (He puts the bread back.) SHUSHAN (to herself) Damn your nonsense! (To GIKO) How is God merciful to us when we’ve been carried away by this flood? If that godless charlatan invents new lies again today and refuses to pay his debt, God only knows what will happen to us. My poor girl’s wasting away day by day. How can she keep body and soul together? (She cries.) My poor KEKEL, the sunshine of your life has left you. Instead of a wedding gown, they’ll carry you off in a funeral shroud. (She cries again.) GIKO (Sobbing, he exits by he door left, drying his eyes.) Oh, my God! (PEPO enters door right, wearing his hat, best suit and girdle, coat half-buttoned, and belt in his hand.) Scene X SHUSHAN, PEPO SHUSHAN Have something to eat before you go. PEPO I don’t deserve bread. (He puts on his belt.) Bread is meant for the likes of Arutin. If I were to eat bread, then what would he eat? Are we equals that we should eat the same food? (Bitter laugh) SHUSHAN It’s a black cloud has darkened my day! (Drying her tears, she exits by door left.) Scene XI PEPO alone PEPO (buttoning his coat) On with it, PEPO! Lick the ground and kiss peoples’ boots. Grovel in the dirt before them. Let them walk all over you. Who are you? What are you? Call yourself a man? You’re just a doormat. You’re not human. You’re made for human consumption. You’re tormented night and day. Stay up till dawn, struggle with the wind and rain, freeze in the winter cold and burn in the summer sun. Go earn your bread and support your mother and sister. What sort of life is this? It’s a dog’s life. You’re just like a dog ferreting around for food. Where’s the human dignity in that, PEPO? (Pause) To be a man, you’ve got to rob people. Got to cheat the poor and murder suckers like me. Make them shed tears of blood for the 25,000 they owe you and make money out of their tears and use the money to build lavish houses and live in them like a lord with horses and carriages and twenty-five servants like me in attendance. Then I’d say you were a man, PEPO, and anything that a man could want or took your fancy, you could come up with. Everybody would bow to you, respect and honor you, and cut each other’s throat so your honor would rest on them. (He exits center door.) End of Act 1